Moses: A Man of Selfless Dedication

Moving right along in Swindoll's Great Lives series, this month I read Moses: A Man of Selfless Dedication.

Just to recap where I've been with this series (in case you are new around these parts), I'm reading through these books over the course of this year.

So far I've learned the following from my reading:

1. I am created for a purpose (David);
2. God will work that purpose in His time frame (Esther); and
3. God will work in ways that may be painful, but He will teach me to live in the pain, through the pain and beyond it and can work in me a tender heart as a result of it (Joseph).

I would say that the abiding message (for me) in taking a journey through Moses' life is this:

4. God honors faithful obedience.

I was reading another book recently which mentioned Moses in a way that rankled me. This other author said that Moses was a broken man because he was an adopted child (of the Pharoah's daughter). This author made a claim that when God met Moses at the burning bush and told him to go and deliver the "Let My People Go" message, Moses found himself ill-qualified because of insecurities he felt as a result of being adopted. Even when I read this I had to reject such a statement of belief. In truth, the claims made me angry because I find nothing in scripture that says, "Moses was adopted and therefore he felt himself useless and insecure all of this life." His life certainly does not reflect that internal belief! Anyone who has a face-to-face relationship with the Almighty has a thing or two going for them, I'd say!

While I'm certainly not going to downplay the emotions adoptees do feel as a result of being transplanted (that's a topic I'm not going to get into here) I don't think Moses was trying to find excuses not to stand before Pharaoh on account of the fact that he was adopted. I think we can really only let his one excuse stand alone and for itself:

"I am slow of tongue."

To say that another way, "I am not a very good public speaker. I feel sick at the thought of standing in front of other people to deliver messages." I wouldn't say that Moses 'didn't know who he was.' I would say that Moses learned who He was in Christ and went before Pharoah (with his brother Aaron) and grew in his faith as a result. Eventually, the man who was afraid of public speaking was doing a great deal of it - before hundreds of thousands of Israelites. I think that's the way God is. He takes us into situations we aren't sure of and grows us there. Before we know it, we're living out the "I'll nevers" that we said we wouldn't do. Furthermore, we'll find that God's strength and good favor will be given to those who obey Him.

There were so many excellent points in this book that I'm having a hard time narrowing down the specific points I wanted to hit on. Per usual, I ended up with a plethora of post-it notes stuck out hither thither and yon. I've actually tried to limit my use of the post-it note - prescribing myself only 4 or 5 per book but I let myself get a bit carried away this time!)

When I look through my notes, the point I am continuously drawn back to is the one I think I can argue the most ineffectively. But here goes anyway.

Swindoll honed in on a lot of Moses' character traits when it came to leading the Israelites. He focused on Moses' strengths and weaknesses when it came to delivering God's messages to His people, his obedience in sharing leadership responsibilities, and he also took a good look at Moses's emotions in various stages of the wilderness pilgrimage.

Swindoll had a particular point to make about how those who are involved in ministry should have a happy spirit that I think is worth us thinking about. First, Swidoll shared the following scripture passage which is a piece of advice that Jethro (Moses's father-in-law) gave to Moses concerning governing the people of Israel:

"Furthermore, you shall select out of all the people able men who fear God, men of truth, those who hate dishonest gain; and you shall place these over them as leaders of thousands, of hundreds, of fifties and of tens. Let them judge the people at all times; and let it be that every major dispute they will bring to you, but every minor dispute they themselves will judge. So it will be easier for you, and they will bear the burden with you." Exodus 18:21-22

The point Swindoll proceeds to make is that a leader who tries to do it all - counsel every individual, attend every individual family party, "do lunch" with all of the men and attend every single church function will be worn down much faster. (See my review of Leaders Who Last for an extended argument for this point.) He recommends that leaders - and others who serve in great capacity - learn to deligate responsibilities. The main counsel that a pastor gives, according to Swindoll, should be an accurate counsel of the Word of God, given from the pulpit. Swindoll's opinion is that a minister of the Gospel who is preaching the true and undefiled Word of the Lord is giving the best counsel to his congregants that he possibly could. (Not to say that some individuals and families do not need additional counseling. That's not the point Swindoll is making at all.) "Merely" this - your pastor can't be expected to carry you through every single detail of your lives. You'll wear him out! Certainly there are times when a pastor in the home is a necessary (and much wanted!) thing - I'm not talking about those moments. I'm talking about the day-to-day things that we should be able to figure out on our own. We don't need to pick up the phone everytime we have a disagreement with our spouse, for example.

I also think this makes a good point as to why the people of God should be about pursuing good theology for themselves. We should learn not to fall prey so quickly and easily to false doctrines but be able to live out our faith. This requires careful thought, study, and devotion to the Word of God in our own right.

If the leader/minister/server is allowed to delegate, it makes their lives easier and more pleasant. I think this is true for just about any one who serves with some regularity and oversees large ministries. I know I've coordinated a lot of events and parties and the thing always goes so much more smoothly and is enjoyable for ME if I can delegate some of the responsibilities. (And I'm only working things out on a small scale!) If one person has to carry the whole load, it become more of a chore than a blessing. And I kind of think - however naively- that being able to lead and serve should be a blessing to those doing it.

Swindoll says this and I like it:

"The happiest people on earth ought to be those in God's service. And they ought to look like it. We have every reason to smile more than anyone else. Even though our work is terribly serious, we ought to have more fun and have a better time doing it than anybody in any other career or calling on earth. I think an individual in cross-cultural ministry or a pastor ought to be able to enjoy his or her taste in music and live it up, just like anybody else. Those vocational servants of Christ ought to have broad tastes and interestss beyond their basic calling, enjoy their families, enjoy their times away and rejoice in good things." (page 258)

Is your pastor happy serving you? Is the leader in any group you are a part of happy to serve? (Husbands happy? Yowee!) And by happy I don't mean (and Swindoll doesn't mean) just a grinning fool who isn't being honest about life. I mean genuinely, deep down happy - rooted in Christ and has Christ bubbling out of them? Happiness runs deep. It isn't a surface level emotion. Happiness comes because you know pain, suffering, hardship -- and the grace and abundant mercy of God. We should care that our leaders - in whatever capacity they are serving - feel and know that.

How can we "followers" make their journey a blessed one? Instead of being like the Children of Israel - always grumbling that things aren't going exactly our way - where we can compromise and smooth the road out a little for those on the journey with us? Questions I'm asking myself.

Annnd I'm gonna stop right there. That's further than I meant to go, actually, but I'm going to leave it.

As I've said at the end of each of these Great Lives books - there is so much to glean and learn and I have appreciated the journey. I heartily recommend them if you haven't picked them up yet.

Next up for me? Elijah: A Man of Heroism and Humility

Tim Hawkins on this Wednesday

It's the middle of the week. It's time for a pick me up in the form of some laughs.

Someone(s) who I will not name -tho they are celebrating a birthday today! - (in case you feel the need to lecture them in the comment section) introduced us to Tim Hawkins and, well, here we are!







And before any home schoolers get mad at me - I was one, Jonathan was one, and our children will be. Which is, perhaps, why we laugh so hard whenever we see this:



To our benefactors ;) - we thank you! And we say Happy Birthday to you! =)

What's On Your Nightstand

Time for another Nightstand carnival (my favorite!) at 5 Minutes for Books! I hope you'll join in and share in what you are reading (or have read) recently.

As for me, I seem to be getting closer and closer every month to my goal of reading purely for pleasure. Even when it comes to reading review copies, I'm turning down more and accepting only books that I think I'm really going to enjoy or benefit from. I'm having a good time and I feel like I'm "in a good place" with my reading. (I say with a complete grin on my face. I can probably only say that right now because my stack is manageable at the moment. ha!)

Anyway, I have a lot of books sitting around that I'm quite excited about - each for their own reason.

First up, I'm currently reading Mr. Revere and I and Ben and Me, both by Robert Lawson and both a lot of fun.




I'm also excited to say that I have a little treat in store for these two books so once I finish reading them you'll see that pop up. These were books that Jonathan had read when he was growing up and I somehow missed so it's been fun to make my acquaintance.

I just finished reading Every Woman's Marriage and Jonathan read the companion title, Every Man's Marriage and so we'll have a joint review of that coming up. (Because that seems to be The Thing to Do these days....sometimes anyway.)




We have a fun trip coming up this coming month (in conjunction with our five year anniversary!) so I am purposing and intending to REALLY, SERIOUSLY, GONNA-DO-IT-THIS-TIME read Ben Hur and listen to the Ben Hur Radio Theatre drama. I keep saying I'm going to and yet I haven't done it yet. Knowing that we have a car ride coming up, I'm hoping to get to the book before our trip so that I can listen to the audio drama with a clean conscience. Heh.



Lastly, for something a little different I have picked up and started reading through/using an up-and-coming title by Harvest House called The 90-Day Fitness Challenge. It's written by two former contestants (from Season 6, if you've followed it) of The Biggest Loser. I haven't seen a single episode of this show but am certainly intrigued (like many Americans) over the concept of it. (How on earth do you get a person to stand up in front of millions of people wearing practically nothing to demonstrate how large they are? I cannot fathom this...) We have some friends who follow the show and cheer for various contestants. Since Youtube has yet to accommodate me by allowing full episodes of the show to air, I haven't quite familiarized myself with it yet. But anyway, all that to say that Harvest House is introducing this book to the world and I like the general concept of it so I'm going to give it the 90 day run and let you know what I think of it at the end of the experience.



I can tell you right now that since there's a certain trip to NYC coming up this month in conjunction with the Book Expo, I am going to cheat in whatever way cheating looks like for a few days. Jennifer has promised cupcakes and pizza and I really want to try a New York City bagel while I'm there. Heh. (Question to Jennifer: We WILL be walking a lot, won't we?) I'm going to need to wrap the 90-Day Challenge around this eating frenzy book trip and somehow it will have to work itself out!

I think I'll leave this Nightstand post alone for now but it gives you just a little taste of what's on my plate. (Need to stop thinking about food here, obviously. They probably tell you that somewhere in this book....)

Happy Reading, all!

Offworld, by Robin Parrish

I'm almost rather snickering putting a "science fiction" label on my post. I'm afraid it will stand alone as the only "science fiction" that I'll read for, oh, awhile.

When I think of science fiction, I usually think of Star Trek. I used to be a Trekker (to be distinguished from a Trekkie) meaning that I liked The Next Generation. Oh yes. My favorite character was Lt. Commander Data, I had myself a uniform (I was 14, ok?) and a tricorder and everything! No joke. I was even a member of the official fan club. Uh-huh! The magazine landed in MY mailbox, folks! I still like a good science fiction movie every now and again (but mostly it has to have "Star Trek" somewhere in the title.)

When Amy asked me to participate in a Faith and Fiction Roundtable, with the recommendation that we read Offworld, I have to say I had my doubts. This isn't really my genre of choice when it comes to books! I thought, however, that it would be fun to give it a whirl. (Follow the Rountable discussion here if you like.)

The intriguing aspect of it was that it was published by Bethany House Publishers which is, of course, a Christian label. Christianized Science Fiction? Well, let's just say my curiosity was piqued. (Of course I liked C.S. Lewis' Space Trilogy but, come on now! There's only one C.S. Lewis! And even his space trilogy is a stretch for me!) So off we went into Offworld.

This book tells the story of NASA's first manned mission to Mars. The cast of main characters includes the four astronauts who made it to Mars and back and a girl they picked up upon their return home named Mae. These astronauts, lead by Commander Christopher Burke, return to earth to find everyone missing. They have no idea what happened, but it would initially appear as if earth has been wiped clean of all human lifeforms. Realization dawns and the crew begin to acknowledge that the lives they had been hoping to return to have been eradicated by the removal of their family and loved ones.

The book details their journey from Florida to Texas where they are headed to search for answers. They find a girl named Mae. They have no idea how she managed to remain on earth or why she is with them at all.

I have to say that I could have never read this book and lived a perfectly happy and fulfilled life. Not that it was BAD. Because it really wasn't. It just wasn't my thing. I've come to the conclusion that I'd much rather watch my science fiction rather than read about it.

I'm happy to say that the book wasn't overtly Christian because I can't figure out how Parrish would have made it so. It definitely would have felt contrived if he had weaved the Gospel message into the book in any kind of blatant manner. (To be blunt, I think that would have just been weird.) If I were to like science fiction, I would have to say that I would have LOVED this book because it was just plain crazy, good fun. No objections to it whatsoever. It was your run-of-the-mill stretch of an imagination with an intriguing plot.

***There is a certain mystery about the book and I want to be careful not to give any spoilers to those of you who might wish to read this for yourself. BEWARE OF A POTENTIAL SPOILER FORTHCOMING (which is essential to the point I want to make about the book.)***

All of the above stated, there were two statements that the author included in this book that I found particularly interesting.

The antagonist in Offworld is named Roston and he is doing everything in his power to keep the crew from making it to Houston and discovering his evil and wicked scheme of eradicating the world's population for the good of the world (in his opinion.) The crew discovers that Roston is behind the mysterious disappearance of everyone on the planet. But the explanation that Roston gives for his actions is worth thinking about for a minute. He says, as an excuse for his actions:

"We will succeed in creating a better world, not because we have superior numbers or superior tactics, but because no one exists to oppose us. We stayed here, so we win by default." (Chapter 18, "The Stiff Heart" page 326)

Essentially this: he clears the world of "sin" so that he can inhabit it and make it as perfect as he thinks it ought to be. Instead of a clear savior figure, we're presented with an exact opposite. Christ came to conquer the world and redeem people so that they can come to God through the knowledge of Jesus Christ. He came to pay the price of sin so that fellowship between God and man could be restored. In Offworld the antagonist removes the people to worship himself. There is no redemption. There is a hateful eradication. It's just a compelling contrast to the Biblical concept of a divine savior and I found that an interesting statement to include in the book.

Secondly, there is a crew member named Terry who makes the following statement after returning from their Mars mission:

"We made history!" Terry cried, his voice echoing in the emptiness.

Owen mused without making eye contact, "Is history still history if no one is around to remember it? Learn from it? Continue building the future on its foundations?" (Chapter 2, "The Smoke and Stir of This Dim Spot." page 49)

That is so true, isn't it? History is exceedingly important for us to learn and to grow from. Without other people around, left all to ourselves on a silent planet, what would the purpose of any of our actions be from a human perspective? It's the same reason the idea of being on a dessert island seems so lonely. We're created for relationship and then we are grown and inspired by stories. We have an inner hope for the way we will grow old with those we love and pass down a heritage to others. Without people, life feels empty.

I thought Parrish did a good job being creative in sharing a message in a more subtle manner. Because of the way he handled it, I would have to say that the book is worth reading (if you like sci-fi!)

I'm certainly not trying to downplay any of his efforts by sharing my thoughts. Truly this was just a genre I find myself not so enthusiastic about so you probably shouldn't expect to see much more of it from me. That said, it was intriguing to have to really think through a book and try to review it when it's not really your "thing." I appreciated the challenge of that at any rate and can at least tell you it was "clean fun" - if you like that sort of thing. Perhaps if he had included some Ferengi and the Borg I'd be more interested? (Life is infinitely more interesting with Ferengi involvement!)

***

As I final note - I'm going to link this up to the I Read It carnival over at 5 Minutes for Books next week because:

a.) I read it at the recommendation/suggestion of book blogger My Friend Amy; and
b.) Lisa read and reviewed this title at 5 Minutes for Books. Follow the link to see what she thought of this one.



The I Read It Carnival isn't until next week which, btw, gives plenty of time to be about the business of reading Tumtum & Nutmeg. (Oh, you thought I was jesting when I said I intended to nag about those books? HAHA!)

Penguin Party

Did you know there is a World Penguin Day?

I didn't. But now I do. It's officially celebrated April 25th and it marks the date in which the Adelie penguins begin their annual northward migration. (Do the penguins actually know that this is the date which they are to begin their trip? As Davy is apt to say, "I wanna know!") But not to leave any penguins out, we acknowledge and are aware of ALL penguins everywhere. (We're equal opportunist, you see.)

To mark this grand and glorious occasion, Sleeping Bear Press - who I might even be tempted to use the phrase "I heart" over - has released Pierre the Penguin which is a very fun title to say. I feel aristocratic already. Like I'm noble-y acknowledging penguins in my own right or something.

This is the story of Pierre (see? you just can't say that name without holding your nose upward!) who was living at the California Academy of Sciences. It was noticed there that poor Pierre had gone and lost his feathers! He didn't want to get into the water because he would have been too cold. Through the ingenuity of a biologist named Pam, a wetsuit was created for our little penguin friend which enabled him to get back in the water. This book is a true story. DUN DUN DUUUUN!!!!! The illustrations are provided by Laura Regan, who has given us many penguins to look at as we enjoy it.

In honor of World Penguin Day, Sleeping Bear Press is offering a giveaway copy of Pierre the Penguin to one of you! Would you like to make friends with Pierre? Simply leave a comment below. This contest is open to U.S. Residents only and will be open through this Friday, April 30th.

In the meantime, want to know how we celebrated World Penguin Day? (Apart from briefly suffering from some kind of stomach bug?)

Well, you can't rightly celebrate without a cake and so we made one! Behold the beauty of white icing (mommy's favorite kind of decorating)!


We played (several rounds of) Don't Break the Ice:


And with our little penguin friend, we played hide-n-seek, out in our yard:


Of course, we also read about Pierre and now we offer the same chance to you!

Good luck and -- HAPPY (belated) WORLD PENGUIN DAY!

Waddle waddle.


THIS GIVEAWAY IS NOW CLOSED - Congrats to the winner - #1 - Page Turner

Faith and Fiction Roundtable

This is one of those rare weekend posts that is occurring because Amy invited me to be a part of her Faith and Fiction Roundtable discussion.

The idea behind this concept is that a group of people read a book and then discuss it. We're each posting portions of the conversation we had our on own sites.

The book of choice was Offworld.

I'll have a full review of this book to post on Monday, but for now, if you'd like, you can read some bits of conversation over the book. Here goes:

Amy: Did you have a favorite character?

Ronnica: I enjoyed the characters (though they could have been a little more three-dimensional).

Jonathan: Characters were in limited supply, obviously, but I still didn't come away from the book attached to any of them. They were a bit 2 dimensional, once I met each one, I knew what to expect.

Mark: I certainly would have to agree with Jon about the characters. They felt very much like stalk characters, and I wasn't too surprised with how they behaved over the course of the series. Maybe one twist took me by surprise, but that was all. However, I did find myself moved by the "wrap up" chapter at the end that show our heroes moving off into their new life. So at some point they did get to me enough that I cared about them.

Amy: Considering I read the book a week ago, and I can't remember the characters names, I'd have to agree I didn't form any strong attachment to them.

Jennifer: I wanted to know what happened to Chris on Mars. His blackouts were very random. I do admit, I had a hard time remembering the difference between Owen and Chris and I thought Trisha was a strong female character.

Jonathan: The other thing that I realized that makes some parts seem unbelievable was that the group of amin characters was perfectly suited for whatever they came up against. The part of adventurers was already equipped to deal with everything. "We need to competently defeat a group of armed soldiers, too bad we're all astronauts. but wait, I'm special ops pretending to be an astronaut, so we're all good." "Trish has Fibromyalgia, and a killer migraine, and she's passed out, but it is ok, Mae's mom was a nurse, so we've got someone who knows exactly what to do."

I did enjoy the banter between the characters, and the way they bonded by the end, even after Owen, or was it Chris... went nuts and shot up the town (I enjoyed that part and sympathized with him) but it did seem that there was a fairly rigid, and therefore predictable way for the book to go.

****
To follow the rest of the discussion, visit these folks:

Ignorant Historian
Random Ramblings from Sunny Southern CA
Behind the eyes, oversimplified
Mrs. Q Book Addict
My Friend Amy

Friday Favs

Thanks, as always, to Suzanne at Living to Tell the Story for hosting!

WHAT A WEEK! Lots of fun things, lots of surprising things, lots of heart things to think about, including the first anniversary of Landon's death. Honestly, I wasn't sure what to expect from the day. And it wasn't what I expected. Instead of ending with a Youtube clip, let's start with one and then I'll share all the wonderful blessings that came out of this hard thing:



1. This year we received flowers on the doorstep. A friend gave us the gift of flowers with a note saying that her family was praying for ours on this anniversary date. This same friend has kinda shared the above "Theme Song" this past year. So when I saw these flowers I thought, "SPRING IS COMING!!!" It won't be long now. It's just about here!

Isn't this pretty?


2. This Wednesday I received an e-mail from a friend who just spoke exactly the right words to boost the spirits this past week. She didn't try to come up with perfect words. She just said, "I'm here and I remember."

You know - it blows me away when others remember significant anniversaries in our family's life. When people remember things that matter to you - your heart just feels unbelievably full. Flowers and e-mails are God's way of shouting down, "HEY! I remember. I care. I love you." Because He sends His comfort through others.

The beyond beautiful thing to learn in the midst of pain is how others respond to it. When you are hurting and someone chooses to speak words of life to you and bless you in some way, do you take note of how they serve you? I never noticed until last year. Last year I took notes of things people did when we were hurting. This year I took notes again. Mental note: Mark down dates on the calendar that are significant to OTHER people. I have all kinds of dates written down that pertain to our family. But I've never written down the dates of other people. Now I'm kind of ashamed of how selfish my calendar looks. I just never thought to do it before. But now I have tasted and seen that the Lord is good by prompting people to do this. How BLESSED am I! Blown away....

3. Strong memories from a year ago....(still running on the friendship theme here).

I called a friend who lived on the opposite side of the country to tell her that Landon had just died. Do you know what she said to me? "I'll see you in a few days." She knew within a split second that she was going to get on a plane and fly across the country to serve both myself and my family. She was invaluable to me. I will never forget that act of sacrifice and service. Never ever. Every single time I think about it (including this moment) - I cry. Not many friends will drop everything and run to you (across the country, no less!) when you really need them. But she did. And she set the example for me.

4. Another friend of the family spent almost two solid weeks with our family following Landon's death. She showed up on our doorstep every morning. She watched our son, she ran errands, she cleaned the house, she did our laundry, she fixed food, etc., etc., etc. Mostly, she just walked alongside me (literally) as I was trying to accomplish tasks. She knew my struggles in being away from my dad when I knew his time on earth was limited. Every time I turned around to ask for help, she answered with a "yes" and a smile and demonstrated Christ's love to us. (I've told her she is never EVER allowed to move away or die herself. She can die the day I do but not a moment before.) She's too rare a friend and I value her.

5. Our church family at the time came together beautifully and cleaned bathrooms, sent cards, dropped off meals and groceries and delicious cinnamon rolls. They picked up dirty tablecloths that needed washing. Errands were run, airport runs were made, people were coordinated, and others caught me in hugs in various moments and just let me cry and told me it was ok. And they asked about my dad which was a really big deal to me. They just knew and they cared and they prayed.

I share all this to say one thing - death is ugly but God does send comfort to us. I look at the ways we were served and how we were ministered to and I remember all of this during this week. I remember the words that were spoken to us in love. I remember the support and the kindnesses. I remember so many little details that just overwhelm me. These are the beautiful things that I want to hold on to. Every year that passes I want to remember them. I never want to forget them because all of these people taught me in their own way how to love like Christ.

This post is not written with a drop of sorrow involved but rather as a pitiful expression of an overwhelmed heart who feels God's love through the expressions of others' and wanted to thank them them anonymously AND publicly today for being such an enormous blessing to myself and to my family. The impact that you had on the way I view death is astounding. Even in the minutes that followed it, beauty started rising out of the hearts of others and this is why I shall end this week with a triumphant SHOUT:

"Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?" 1 Corinthians 15:55

Jesus has conquered the grave.

Blessed beyond measure,

Carrie

Dreams

I know that not everyone will agree with this, but I am of the opinion that God can speak to us in a variety of ways and still speaks to us today. I DON'T think He's revealing new things about Himself and that we should go hog wild in our behaviors and experimentation as to how we can connect with God. Rather, I think we still need to look at scriptures to see how God communicated in the past and not expect that He is going to start appearing to us in pieces of cloth, or grilled cheese sandwiches, or as a large African American woman baking in a kitchen in a shack in the woods, or through magical portals. (But I digress...)

One way that I DO believe God still speaks to His people is through dreams but even then I would say that such dreams needed to be examined, tested and tried before they are just declared to be "from God."

That said, there have been a few occasions where I've had dreams that I've submitted to the spiritual authorities in my life for examination. These dreams have been inspiring and encouraging. I wouldn't add them to the canons of scripture or anything like that. Rather, they've merely been a gift of encouragement to me during some significant rough spots in my life journey, reminding me of scriptural truths. The following was one such dream which I offer up as encouragement to you because I think it can be that, as a good story could be. Not a scriptural truth but representing one all the same.

The following dream reminds me of these verses:

We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body. 2 Corinthians 4: 8-11

With all of my above disclaimers, and shared with the knowledge that God shares His attributes with me through stories...without further ado....

My Dream (March 2007):

I wanted to go on an adventure so an Adventure Guide was assigned to me. He had a khaki outfit on it, complete with vest, etc. He told me we were going to go on an adventure on the ocean. I agreed to go. He helped me aboard a raft. The raft was completely flat and was made out of a solid piece of material. It wasn't made of wood like you'd normally think of - but was more of a metal looking thing -- completely flat with a slick surface.

My Adventure Guide (that was his official title in my dream) talked to me while the raft was led out to sea. I noticed that the raft was attached to a boat. The boat was pulling the raft. I didn't take note of who was in the boat or anything of it. I was focused on the raft. We traveled out to sea whereupon the sky grew very dark and a storm overtook us. The waves got higher and the wind blew harder. It was a picture like you'd see on a movie where the storm comes in the night and the only light is provided by a reflection of the moon on the water.

I asked the Guide if we were going to go back to port. I told him I wanted the adventure to be over. He said we had to ride out the storm. In the meantime, the raft did a complete flip over, like a capsizing. I came back out standing on top of the raft, holding the Adventure Guide's hand but I was sopping wet and scared of the storm. I yelled at my Adventure Guide that the storm was getting too rough and couldn't the boat steer us a bit straighter so that we wouldn't capsize??!!??

Then the Adventure Guide pointed at the boat. I noticed that there was one person driving the boat and he was in an enclosed cabin. I could only see the back of this person's head. I never saw his face. The driver was wearing a Captain's Hat. I took note of all of this and then the Adventure Guide pointed to the Captain and said, "He's purposefully steering the boat like this." (We were zig zagging.) I asked "WHY?! We're going to flip over again if He isn't careful!" He calmly said, "It's not the storm that is causing us to flip -- it's the Captain himself. Look..." I looked inside the cabin, through the pouring rain, and saw that the Captain had a little knobbed handle that he could move from right to left. A flick of the handle would cause the raft to flip. "Watch," he said. I watched as the Captain reached over (again, all I could see was the back of the Captain with his Captain's hat on.) and flipped the switch. We flipped again and I crashed through the water and waves, clutching onto my Adventure Guide's hand and again, I came back up with my feet planted firmly on the raft. I was gasping for air.

Then the Adventure Guide told me that the Adventure was in learning to stand my ground without holding on to his hand, even though the raft was going to flip. (He would still be on board the raft, but the fear would not be.) The next thing I knew, the Captain Himself was standing in my peripheral vision. He was holding onto my right hand while the Adventure Guide was holding on to my left hand. The Captain caused the raft to flip again. I clutched on to both of their hands, terrified. We came back up. The AG told me that I could stand my ground alone, with practice. (The Guide would still be on the raft with me, but I wouldn't need to be held up to make it through a flip.) The raft flipped again. This time I held on to their hands for half the flip and let go at the end of the flip and tried to steady myself. The AG encouraged me while the Captain stood silently by. We flipped twice more before I could do it without holding their hands so tightly.

And then I woke up.

****
Occasionally I'll come across a story, see a picture or hear a song that reminds me of this dream and gives me renewed strength and encouragement to not fear life so much, but to hold steady. I haven't completely let go of the fear and every so often I take a tumble again. But I do find it easier, when trials come, to say, "Oh! God is in this!" I start looking for Him faster, eager to find Him.

Recently I heard this song and it reminded me of my dream which sparked the memory and I thought I would share it.

I will swim in the deep
'Cuz You'll be next to me
You're in the eye of the storm
And the calm of the sea
You'll never out of reach

God, You know where I've been
You were there with me then
You were faithful before
You'll be faithful again
I'm holding Your hand

There's a raging sea
Right in front of me
Wants to pull me in
Bring me to my knees
So let the waters rise
If You want them to
I will follow You

Be Still, My Soul

Today marks the first anniversary of a day no one in either side of my family will ever forget. Early in the morning we received a call saying that my brother-in-law, Landon, had died while traveling home late at night. He had fallen asleep at the wheel.

Jonathan and I were in Texas with my family at the time, as my dad was battling cancer and we weren't sure how much longer he would be with us. As it turns out, he died almost exactly one month later. To say that last spring was rough is a complete understatement.

When I saw the book Be Still, My Soul: Embracing God's Purpose and Provision in Suffering was to be released by Crossway Books, I knew it was a book I wanted to spend a little time with, as we approached these significant anniversaries.

Be Still, My Soul was edited by Nancy Gutherie - a lady who knows a little about suffering herself. She has lost two children of her own and has had to deal with her own grief. She chose articles and sermons, scriptures and quotes which speak to suffering and makes every attempt to comfort her reader with one solemn truth: God knows. God cares. God is sovereign. At one hundred and seventy pages, this book is a quick read, but a hard one. I would say that it is a good book to read for two particular groups of people:

1. It is good for people who have walked in the valley of the shadow of death.

2. It is good for people who have not walked in death's shadow, but who need to learn how to comfort those who are.

Note: I very specifically stated that those who have not walked with death need to learn how to comfort those who have.

Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Romans 12:12

See, it's not an either/or kind of thing - it's a both/and. Knowing what to say to someone who is hurting is a difficult thing to be sure. But just because something is difficult, doesn't mean that we're supposed to shy away from it. We really have no excuse.

Be Still, My Soul is divided up into three sections:

1. God's Perspective on Suffering;
2. God's Purpose in Suffering; and
3. God's Provision in Suffering.

It contains writings by the following people: Philip Yancey, R.C. Sproul, John Calvin, Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Abraham Kuyper, Martyn Lloyd-Jones, St. Augustine, J.I. Packer, John Piper and many other well-known Christians. It is an amazing collection of works which, combined, assure the reader that nothing happens by mistake or is outside of God's control. It comforts the reader, reminding them that God will supply all of their needs and is, in fact, working for their benefit. We are finite beings. We see only glimpses and moments in time. God is infinite. His gaze spans history and we can trust that His working plan is better than our own.

One of the most amazing things said to Jonathan and I following the death of our family members was that, "This was a tragedy. God doesn't mean for things like this to happen."

To rephrase that, "words of comfort" were used to say that God was all about making us happy and that Satan orchestrated these deaths and worked against us and our family by taking our loved ones away.

To this I must say that such a statement is untrue! I know that they meant well but the statements were wrong. Landon died accidentally? God messed up? It was all a cosmic accident? The God I believe in is not sovereign enough to work His will in the world? That He was blinded by a momentary flash of light and failed to notice what was happening down below?! No. I don't think so.

What happened last spring was no accident, neither was God inflicting His wrath on any of us. He was working for our good and for His glory, as painful as that is to realize and accept.

If you read the story of Job in scripture we can see that God brought the matter of Job up to Satan. God allowed Job to suffer difficulties. Why? We can ask that question but it doesn't change the answer: God is good. All of the time. He is never evil. While Satan certainly meant what befell Job to be evil, God did not.

" . . . you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good . . . " Genesis 50:20

"One day God will close the curtain on evil and, with it, all suffering and sorrow. Until then, I'll keep remembering something else Steve Estes once told me as he rested his hand on my wheelchair: "God permits what He hates to accomplish what He loves." I can smile knowing that God is accomplishing what He loves in my life - Christ in me, the hope of glory. And this is no Plan B for my life, but His good and loving Plan A." (Tada, "God's Plan A.")

"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28

"I am especially concerned when events are described as a "senseless tragedy." If we look closely at the phrase, it becomes obvious that "senseless tragedy" is an oxymoron. It is a self-contradictory statement, a phrase that makes no sense. For something to be defined as "tragic" there must first be some standard of good for it to be tragic over against. But if things happen in a way that is "senseless," there cannot be anything that is either a tragedy or a blessing. Each event would simply be meaningless.

The word "tragedy" presupposes some kind of order or purpose in the world. If the world has purpose and order, then all that occurs in it is meaningful in some respect. The idea of a "senseless tragedy" represents a worldview that is completely incompatible with Christian thought. It assumes that something happens without purpose or meaning. If God is God and if he is a God of providence, if he is truly sovereign, then nothing ever happens is ultimately senseless. Things may appear to be without purpose or meaning. Their ultimate purpose might elude us for the present. Yet if we fail to see purpose in what happens, we must remember that our view of things is limited by our earthly perspective." (R.C. Sproul, "Senseless Tragedy?")

To question God? I don't think that is in my best interest.

The point of suffering is to strip us of our sins, to draw us closer to Christ, to remind us that life is precious and brief and to focus on eyes on God and on Heaven. Heaven then will be the place without question marks, tears or pain. For now we kind of have to walk in faith a bit. But to walk away from faith in God's ability to be sovereign is not in the least bit attractive and so I must reject the statements that any pain I suffer is a cosmic accident. He is good. He is gracious. He is kind. He is merciful to us on our tearful and darkest nights. He is in the pain. He is around the pain. He carries us through the pain.

There is not one emotion that I have felt that Jesus didn't experience in human flesh. He knows my family's pain. He knows our sorrows. But His vision extends further than mine/ ours and He sees what we cannot see - a perfect future. We walk by faith. We say, "It is well with my soul" because we believe in His sovereignty and in His perfect plan. Though we cannot always understand, He also doesn't expect us to. Faith. Hope. Love. All of these things - HE IS.

Could I recommend this book? In less than a heartbeat. Its truths are sure. Bad things happens. God knows and allowed them to happen. But He also stands ready to comfort us and will even listen to our questions. But just because we have questions, doesn't mean He is required to answer them all. Not here. Not now. No matter how hard we might feel like stomping our feet or how loud we might feel like screaming.

The good news is, He doesn't expect us to recover in a day. He knows we are incapable of doing so. Therefore He promises never to leave us or forsake us - not in one day, or three hundred and sixty-five days, or a thousand! He is still here with us. And He is still good.

Kids' Picks - One Too Many

Time for another Kid Pick carnival at 5 Minutes for Books.

This month, we explored and discovered One Too Many: A Seek & Find Counting Book by Gianna Marino.

Bookworm1 surprised me by really liking this book. Not that it is unlikeable. I just didn't think he would get it. But he did and he loved it!

Illustrated with black and white illustrations, you count up the animals, from one to 'one too many!'

On the first page we see a fly bouncing into the page. It, of course, is black. It bounces into two cows - jerseys, of course. By the time you turn the page, you are looking at one fly, two cows and three black and white horses which start to make the eyes feel energetic and the page feel a bit crowded. But we're not done! Oh no! There are a lot more animals to add to this barnyard scene and it because trickier and trickier to count them out of the crowd.

Bookworm1 is a fan of the I Spy books so I shouldn't have really been so surprised that he latched on to One Too Many so quickly. From beginning to end, he enjoyed figuring out what animals had joined the scene and was working at hunting them all out!

So, despite it's simplistic (and yet complicated!) design and idea, we're happy to recommend this one. Think of it as a sophisticated I Spy book with farm animals. It's definitely more artsy. I don't meant to sound so surprised about liking it but, in truth, I am!



Ever been surprised by what your kids pick to love? I hope you'll decide to share with us over at 5 Minutes for Books!

Jennifer Knapp Has an Announcement to Make

If you somehow missed the news, Christian Music star, (during the years 1998-2002ish), Jennifer Knapp announced last week that she is re-entering the music scene after an seven year hiatus. Perhaps even more surprising is her announcement that she is a lesbian.

I saw CNN make the announcement and then I read through the interview of Knapp which was conducted by Christianity Today. I was filled with dread for two reasons:

1.) The media is using Knapp to taunt Christians and test their response to Knapp's announcements. This really isn't about Knapp's "orientation." It's about grinning in the face of those who believe that homosexuality is a sin and seeing what kind of response they can rile up.

2.) Christians will not know how to respond. I'll use the term "we" here and say that Christians reading this announcement are, first of all, likely stunned. And when we're stunned, the typical response is to want to run and hide somewhere and pray desperately that someone else will stand up and take the heat by speaking on behalf of us all. We're relieved when this happens. Relieved we weren't called on to give an answer. Relieved when we don't have to be "the bad guy" who is taking the heat. Let someone else do that.

So we find ourselves reading about Knapp and catching up on her news in the quiet and safety of our own homes, grateful that no one knows how much (or how little) we know on the subject matter. If they don't know what we know, then they can't ask questions.

We'll be left alone.

Jennifer Knapp will also be left alone as a result of our silence. The quicker this will all blow over and Christians can breathe a sigh of relief (mostly.) The situation will have various effects and most of all we Christians will be sad.

We won't have learned anything.

Jennifer Knapp will not have learned anything either.

I read her interview with Christianity Today and found it to be the most insightful and telling regarding her desire to pursue a lesbian relationship. She made this rather amazing statement which blew me away. She says:

"I'm not capable of getting into the theological argument as to whether or not we should or shouldn't allow homosexuals within our church." - Jennifer Knapp, interview with Christianity Today)

I think that one sentence and admission says it all.

Let me make this abundantly clear:

I am not here to debate homosexuality.

I'm here to say that we don't know our theology well enough to know what is good and what is bad. We can't tell black from white, right from wrong because we don't know what we believe. We can't give a concise response to CNN or even Christianity Today because we've decided that God can be anything we like and/or want Him to be. Anything goes and we're given permission to Sin Boldly so that grace can abound. (What?)

Today we have a Bible that is three words long: "God is love." Everything else has been thrown out.

We've forgotten about His holiness. We don't know the meaning of true grace. We've long since forgotten His faithfulness to us and not unlike the children of Israel - we're wandering in our homemade wildernesses. We compartmentalize our sins instead of lumping them all together and calling them out for what they are.

We want to segregate ourselves so that we can be among those who are "understanding" of ourselves. So we ask for the Church of Homosexuals, the Church of Prostitutes, the Church of Those With Foul Mouths, the Church of Divorcees, the Church of Angry People, the Church of _______ (you fill in your own blank.) Even The Church Where You Win a New Car (and feel good about yourself while doing it!) Instead of learning how to be the body of Christ in the way that it was designed to operate - with everyone learning to live and function together, utilizing the gifts and pointing out the flaws in a loving (but firm) manner - we're begging for sympathy. We've built for ourselves a sympathy god but we've failed to realize that that god is ourselves. We're falling apart at the seams and we don't even know it. We ask for understanding and we find none because we're seeking wisdom from imperfect sources.

But then along comes CNN and they have something to say to us, something to use as a weapon to jeer at our belief system. I don't really feel like they are deserving of an answer. Sometimes we are to answer the fool according to their folly and other times we are not. Right now CNN is the fool that doesn't deserve an answer and so this post isn't directed at them. This post is directed at Christendom who does need to learn to give an answer. We've lost our footing, not necessarily because it's been taken away - but because we've given it away because of fear, pride and any other number of sins.

We each have our sins but do we even know what they are? How can we as Christians become more Christ-like if we are not examining ourselves in the light of scripture? Do we even know that when we become Christians we are saying that we want to be like Christ? And to be like Him, we have to know Him. And to know Him is to learn that there are right things and wrong things. There is such a thing as holiness and there are things that offend it. There is truth and untruth. There is justice and injustice, mercy and grace AND love .............AND holiness.

Romans 6: Dead to Sin, Alive to Christ (NIV)

¹What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? ²By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer? ³Or don't you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? ⁴We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.

⁵If we have been united with him like this in his death, we will certainly also be united with him in his resurrection. ⁶For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin— ⁷because anyone who has died has been freed from sin.

⁸Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. ⁹For we know that since Christ was raised from the dead, he cannot die again; death no longer has mastery over him. ¹⁰The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God.

¹¹In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. ¹²Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. ¹³Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness. ¹⁴For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace.

¹⁵What then? Shall we sin because we are not under law but under grace? By no means! ¹⁶Don't you know that when you offer yourselves to someone to obey him as slaves, you are slaves to the one whom you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness? ¹⁷But thanks be to God that, though you used to be slaves to sin, you wholeheartedly obeyed the form of teaching to which you were entrusted. ¹⁸You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.

¹⁹I put this in human terms because you are weak in your natural selves. Just as you used to offer the parts of your body in slavery to impurity and to ever-increasing wickedness, so now offer them in slavery to righteousness leading to holiness. ²⁰When you were slaves to sin, you were free from the control of righteousness. ²¹What benefit did you reap at that time from the things you are now ashamed of? Those things result in death! ²²But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves to God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life. ²³For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

We are still called to know what sin is and to avoid it. It is a gift to be forgiven. A gift - so none of us can boast! And when we are given a gift we should want to say, "Thank you" to the giver. In this case, the giver asks for obedience to Him and unless we know what His rules are, we will have no ability to obey. We have to know the rules, folks. We have to study and understand. People will continue to question our faith and their own and we need to be ready to give them solid answers to their questions.

Can you do that? That's exactly the question I'm asking myself.

It's the question we as Christians should keep asking ourselves until we're willing to discipline ourselves to know God and who He is. Jennifer Knapp is not the first person to raise issues over what Christianity is, nor will she be the last. But she can prompt us to get back down on our knees to pray for wisdom to know what to say, when to say it, and who to say it to. She could be just the encouragement we need to re-open the Word of God and discover what it says. She could be just the prompter we need to stand up for what we believe in.

She could be.

Or we could return to our quiet, private lives and keep pretending to ourselves that everyone likes us all of the time.

Whether or not we decide to stay mum and hide, the fact remains: the truth will never change.

But we can.

Movie Review: Burton's Alice in Wonderland (2010)

This past week Jonathan took me to see the new Disney/Tim Burton version of Alice in Wonderland (2010).

I should tell you up front that I've never seen anything by Tim Burton before (as I've never had the desire) and I am a far cry from being a Johnny Depp fan. (I don't dislike him but he's never played a character in a way to make me like him either. I like people who make me like them.) So I went in predisposed to the following:

1. Not to care much about Tim Burton's imagination;
2. Not to care much about Johnny Depp's performance; and
3. Not caring whether or not the story held true to Lewis Carroll's original tale.

That all declared, I give this film neither a thumbs up or a thumbs down. It was weird which I feel was the point and purpose of the entire movie so it didn't fail to miss the mark with me. Then again, I've always found Carroll's story weird and endearing. It's a strange mix of imagination and hallucination and, not being terribly attached to the storyline, I don't really care too much what various interpretations people give to it. (Unlike Anne where if you stray a jot or tittle, I'd like to have your hide!) I did very much enjoy Frank Beddor's take on Alice in The Looking Glass Wars. I thought Burton kinda had the same idea and wondered if Beddor is grinding his teeth a little.

The movie was all I expected from a Burton film. Weirdness. (I should probably pick a better word but I kinda think that one is just about right!) Strange characters who are over dramatized. Characters who are painted to look freakish or hilarious, depending on how you are predisposed to approach something which is pointedly unusual.

I thought the following line from the film said it best, in terms of Burton's worldview:

"Have I gone mad?"- Hatter

"I'm afraid so, you're entirely bonkers. But I'll tell you a secret... all the best people are."

- Alice Kingsley.

This quote was used twice in the film and when I googled it I found a lot of people who identified with it. I find this most interesting. You can google the phrase, "Quotes from Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland" and it comes up with some random, inconsequential remarks. But if you google this specific quote from the film, teenagers everywhere are 'going mad' themselves over it, trying to find ways to fit it into their every day conversations.

I think the popularity of this quote kind of indicates why this film should be watched with caution. Certainly we should be discerning about every thing we set before our eyes. I walked out of the movie theater feeling like Burton was trying to make a point: "Unique and mildly crazy is good." Another way to say that is, "Let's all do what's right in our own eyes." Because there was nothing typical about this particular cinematic experience, (instead coming across as rather audacious and in-your-face), I would say that this movie most strongly argues for individuality and sensationalism. It's kind of like the ten year old boy who wants to dye his hair purple and spike it just to marinate in the idea that he has shocked the adults and has their undivided attentions. And it works! This is why Tim Burton is making lots of money (and I, for the record, am not.)

Now, from the standpoint of going to the movies just to be entertained, we were that! We probably both enjoyed the first half of the movie better than the second half. Burton opens his story well and the costumes were really quite fantastical. It boggles the mind how much work went into birthing such visions of creativity in bringing well-known (and yet not known) characters to life.

Speaking of the characters - I thought I would have managed to like the Queen of Hearts a little better if she had consistently made use of her lisp. (It came and went and I couldn't predict when I'd hear it next which was mildly disconcerting.) I didn't care for the White Queen (played by Anne Hathaway) at all. I thought she was just plain ridiculous. I DID like Alice and if Depp had been more toned down I might have been able to say that I liked the Mad Hatter. But since I was being told by Burton to like everyone because they were crazy, it turns out that I hardly liked anyone at all. Instead, I found the entertainment solely in the storyline which WAS unique and creative and - dare I say it - fun?

The premise of the movie is great (in my opinion.) Alice is a bright and imaginative young girl who is being offered a proposal of marriage that society thinks she should not refuse. Alice, however, has hesitations and instead of marriage she chases a rabbit down a hole. You probably know where she goes from there. Instead of just exploring Wonderland though, it turns out she's been purposefully called in this strange new world to do battle against the Red Queen's Jabberwalky. Instead of a tripping around Tweedledum and Tweedledee (Disney-fied) it's Alice running from danger and trying to restore the White Queen to the throne. It's adventurous and suspenseful and I DID like that. I thought Burton did a good job making "Wonderland" feel like that was exactly what it was supposed to be called.

Whether or not you would like the film is anyone's guess. I don't think it is so crazy a movie that it is to be avoided. However, I do think it is so crazy that anyone watching it should be careful and discerning about the message behind the movie. (For, to be sure, there are messages even when you aren't specifically looking for them!) For a date night out - it was fun and it gave us lots to talk about. As a way to just escape reality and relax? (Wait. Isn't that what date nights are for?!?!) Well, it's not a movie that I think you can just turn your brain off and sit through. There's too much there for one to think about and maybe that's one reason why the film hasn't been as successful as some hoped. It's SO crazy that your brain has to work overtime to take it all in and process it.

That said, if the most impressive thing you walked out of the theater with is the above quote I shared, then I suppose you've gotten the main point. Be unique. Be crazy. Be YOU. (Unless you are around ME and then I would beg you to tone it down a bit.)